Joe Balaz
Bold Hawaiians
Yeeha!
All da brownie buggahs
going run amok!
Look at da many bold Hawaiians
dat stay quality worthy
doing all kine innovative tings
dat exploratory natives can do.
Up da ladder
and jump da rungs
like wun giant mo’o
wit big kine lungs
dat going take wun deep breath
and blow all da stereotypes away.
Kanaka Maoli
is reclaiming wun sweet spot
right in da middle of da Pacific
wheah dey always wuz.
Piece of da pie poke
and rich cream a la mode
wit wun cherry on top
dat going open da road
to watevah level of success
dat going come to be.
Grandpa and Tutu
stay all proud
as all da mo’opuna
stay shouting out loud
dat it’s pau hana
foa da downside
cause da arrow
is pointing skyward.
Nice to see
da confident chests stick out
and all da shoulders
strong and stout
as da islands
change foa da bettah
wen all da bold Hawaiians
do dere ting.
Kanaka Maoli: Native Hawaiians.
mo’o: Lizard
mo’opuna: Grandchildren.
pau hana: As slang it means “it’s all over.”
poke: Cut into pieces
tutu: Grandmother.
Barack on da Rock
Barack
I know you not da president anymoa
but it would be interesting to hear
wat you have to say
since you wen kinnah set
wun precedent
wen you wuz still in office.
Wat is sacred deah
is sacred heah
and since you grew up in Hawai’i
you would know all about
da local kine vibes.
No tell me Punahou
wen whitewash your consciousness.
I not saying anyting bad
but back in da day on da court
wen you wuz playing basketball
foa da Buff ‘n Blue
I hope Kamehameha
wen pound da hell
out of you guys.
Maybe you wuz different
in your formative years
so we not going hold dat against you.
Nowadays dough
you get wun big chance foa rebound
and try dunk foa us
by becoming
wun impressive community activist
and making
wun parallel to da Hawaiians
wit wat you said
about somebody else’s mountain.
Dat wuz pretty cool
how you wen help to rename
Mount McKinley to Denali
da name dat nearby Native Americans
in Alaska
have long since used.
You wen recognize
dat da name and da mountain
wuz sacred to dem.
So now
even dough you wun private citizen
we like you foa be helpful
and use your influence
to go further down da road.
Come on Barry,
make haole hari-kari,
and in regards to Hawai’i
no slide into Oreo cookie mode.
Try to remembah dose “Choom Gang” days
wit your high school clique
and go light up wun joint
wit Michelle
so you can meditate on da topic
and consolidate your resolve.
In your altered state
maybe wun giant psychedelic flock
of yellow talking birds
would fly into your mind
and convince you
to suggest to da powers dat be
dat maybe da disliked telescopes
on Mauna Kea
should be moved to da Canary Islands.
Dat mountain is sacred to us
just like Denali is
to our distant cousins on da continent.
Barack
you wen grow up on da rock—
Do da Kanaka Maoli
wun huge favor
and go trow wun big stone foa us.
choom: To smoke marijuana.
“Choom Gang”: High school clique of former President Barack Obama.
haole: Caucasian.
Kamehameha: Private high school in Hawai’i for children of Hawaiian ancestry.
Kanaka Maoli: Native Hawaiians.
Mauna Kea: Mountain on which some Native Hawaiians protest against existing and new construction of telescopes.
Punahou: Elite private school in Hawai’i founded by early missionaries.
Joe Balaz: "I have created works in American English and Hawaiian Islands Pidgin (Hawai'i Creole English). I presently live in Cleveland, Ohio, and I am the author of Pidgin Eye, which was chosen by NBC News as one of the best new books for Asian Pacific American Heritage Month 2019."